As an arborist, I have never grasped the concept of trees as a problem. A tree is a tree, in the same way that a spade is a spade, a brick is a brick, and the colour red is… red. These things are just things and while there is variation (considerable variation) the thing itself is not difficult or sinister, it has no agenda, ambition or ulterior motive. It just exists. So when I come across people (so many people) that hate trees, I tend to think that there is something wrong with them – how can one hate something for existing. Hating a tree would be like hating kittens or hating the word wheelbarrow or the number 94 – people like that are clearly deranged, people like that need a type of help that I am not able to provide.

So with that in mind, I have always considered that people who have problems with trees are insane. Too easy, they have the issue, the problem is their problem, not my problem. But what if they are not mad? What if their problem is real, what if they are not disturbed lunatics but just frustrated? What if the tree is actually causing them a problem? Maybe not all trees are good, maybe trees can be a nuisance.

I’m still coming to terms with this, so forgive me as this is a new concept. Clearly, people that hate all trees, or all of anything have phycological problems and I’m not trying to belittle them or their issues – their concerns are real to them, and I wish them all the help they can get. And I’m not including the lazy developers or short-sighted individuals who hate trees so they can subdivide to make more ticky-tacky houses wedged into tiny spaces, or to accommodate an extra triple-car garage because the client’s fizz-boat has been displaced by their growing collection of muscle-cars. No, I’m not including those people. And I’m not including waring neighbours that blame everything on the trees – I’ve dealt with their dispute for over 20 years and not once has it ever been all about the tree.

I’m talking about sensible people, that have real problems because of a tree. They don’t hate all trees, there are just one or two trees that for one reason or another is causing them woe. Fixable problems that will end once the tree or trees have been dealt with. Problem solved.

Note I’m also excluding people who are scared of trees because the tree is too big or because it might fall over in a storm – those concerns seem far too convenient or fit into one or more of the categories noted above… And I won’t accept that trees are dangerous. Dangerous implies intent. A tree is dangerous in the same way that a car is – a car with no breaks and bald tires being driven too fast by a drunk driver not wearing a seatbelt. If you don’t look after your tree (or your car) and you do silly things to your tree (or when driving your car), then yes bad things can happen. But if you look after it and keep it maintained there should be no reason for your tree (or your car) to be dangerous.

But yes, trees can be or become a problem. I can accept that. Trees do drop leaves, even the evergreen ones (evergreen trees drop leaves all year round). Tree roots can lift driveway and footpaths, and yes it is in part the construction of the driveway or footpath that draws the roots to it, but once the roots are there they will lift it. Tree roots get into drains, they fill up pipes and cause blockages, and yes roots can’t break into a pipe, but if the pipe is broken they can get in. Fruit and flowers attract insects as well as all sorts of vermin. Pollen can be disastrous for those that are affected by it. Touching some trees can cause allergic reactions. Leaves and fruit can stain all sorts of surfaces. Shade can cause no end of problems. There are trip hazards (fruit and roots), they make a mess, they set seeds, they produce suckers, and they can poison pets. The list is quite long and nothing you haven’t already heard.

Sometimes trees end up in the wrong place – obviously trees don’t move, but the wants and needs of the place may change and the tree ends up being in the wrong place. Sometimes a tree is planted and it grows bigger than what the salesperson said it would (they said it would only grow 3m tall), or maybe it was planted under the powerlines. Maybe someone else planted it and there isn’t room for five forest trees in the front yard.

So, as an arborist who likes trees or as a landscaper who plants them – what can we do about problematic trees?

First off we need to acknowledge that it’s not the tree’s fault. If a tree is or becomes a problem it is because of where it was planted and/or how it was maintained. The tree isn’t out there actively or intentionally causing problems. Secondly, not all people that hate trees are mad. And thirdly, if you are going to remove a tree then plant two more somewhere else. We plant trees for the future. While your tree might end up in the wrong place, at least it’s in a place that gives our future landscapers and future arborists the option of what to do with it. If it’s not there then they’ll need to wait 20 years, because we all know that the best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago.

• Written for  NZ Landscaper Magazine